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There comes a time where you luck out, but you cut the bull a long time ago and you know something has to change. At that point, you're just biding your time until you get the chance to do so. Well, I'm at that point. It's pretty obvious that I need to try and end this year with a bang. That way my GPA doesn't suck and I can finally enjoy the summer (some) without giving anyone (my parents) some ammunition (which they'd deserve to use against me). At some point, you want to be able to say that ACTUALLY gave it a solid effort....not that you actually succeeded (which you most likely will), but that you gave what you could.

so.....this is me trying for once in my damn life

Happy Holidays My A**

I don't really want to go home for the holidays. It's 10 minutes away but it seems kind of like a whole different world. I just don't want to go home because I lose the fast internet, standard cable and my overall sense of freedom. I don't see anything special happening in the next week (not that it would have been any different here on campus), but anything can happen. For the first time I actually feel guilty for not wanting to be around my family. Family should be enough right? Well, obviously not when you lose the things that kind of helped you keep your sanity. either way, don't go telling the family this, they're really good people and it would be nice if they could have their holiday without this over their head..............

.....Default Character

You know what I mean. That blindingly obvious one dimensional character. You see them everywhere. And you've been looking at one for a few years now. That character is me. If this was Phantasy Star Online, I'd be a human. Nothing really bad, but Nothing special about them either. I have a guitar, but I can hardly play it. I can conjure a picture (or what I like to think passes for one) but I can't make anything even close to the worst on Deviantart (on second thought, maybe I can....) I have a few computer skills but I am by no means a 1337 haxor. I'm not a extraordinary student, but I'm not apathetic failure either. And yet everyone seems to see something in me and I have to wonder why. Am I selling myself short? I mean after all, you notice what you are, but never what you AREN'T until that becomes what you want to be...................*sigh*

VMA's, Facebook and the Reporter

Yeah,so as most of you know......I'm trying to get a job so I can gets some moneyz

well, I'm trying to apply to the Reporter magazine on campus so here's my sample writing

Mixed Reactions

I don’t watch the VMA’s. I don’t care much for popularity contests (or anything that appears so for that matter). You are entitled to like what you like but I don’t care to have a ceremony telling me about it. Nonetheless, I do have a facebook page and Sunday night when all of the VMA hate poured into my news feed, I got interested. Amongst the angst and myriad of expletives three names stood out: Kayne West, Beyonce and Taylor Swift

As expressed before, I didn’t watch the VMA’s (due to a mix of technical difficulties and a lack of interest), but I was able to see the segment entailing Kayne’s opinion on Taylor Swift’s award for best female video. In retrospect there is only one thing that comes to mind to describe the act: rude. Though they were meant well and I can understand the sentiment behind his actions, his execution was poor. He ruined Ms. Swift’s moment to enjoy an award she won. As much as he may have disagreed with the situation, she had nothing to do with Beyonce not winning and should not have been in the crossfire. I raise the question: what he would have done had someone done the same to him- though I dearly hope no one does. It would have been better to wait until after show, then rip the MTV if he thought the decision was wrong. Mr. West committed what I like to call a “PETA”, or when a social powerhouse presents a noteworthy message, but does so in such an inflammatory manner that the message is lost behind the method of presentation. Fortunately, Beyonce allowed Ms. Swift a redo at her acceptance speech and Mr. West has apologized, so perhaps this isn’t signaling the breakdown of society as some feared.

What still troubles me though, is the reception some offered his actions. Some of my friends thought he was “beast” for his choice. I respect the sentiment behind their opinions as Mr. West is seen as a “rebel”, as he is not afraid to speak his mind, and that is a quality to be admired- within reason. Resistance of any kind, whether its against the media, the status quo or anything of the sort, can be messy and in your rebelling one must be careful to not become like whatever he or she is rebelling against. In other words, you must still care about how your actions are going to affect others. I’m hoping dearly that we as a society don’t value brash action and reckless abandon in our dealings with each other just because it’s all in the name of rebellion. It may be well intentioned, but the road to hell is paved with good intentions, as the adage goes. Furthermore, it appeared that the main reason behind why they hailed his behavior is because they didn’t believe that Ms. Swift deserved the award.

And that brings me to my final point. I’m not sure if anyone noticed, but the VMA’s are for pop culture art forms. As far as art goes, aren’t most of our arguments subjective? Aren’t they just our opinions on whether we like the art or not? So that is why I’m dismayed over all the fuss. Not to say that art that many enjoy shouldn’t be recognized or awarded, but it helps keep things in perspective if we recognize how much of it is really just opinion.

All and all, this isn’t a horrific incident, but it has helped to remind me why I don’t like popularity contests- they seem to always leave a wake of hurt egos and broken relations.

And so the reluctanct hero steps out........

okay...simple: I have NO F***** idea why I did this. Oh yeah, I got tired of reading EVERYONE ELSE's. There you go.........